The blog I’ve been waiting for.

I’m calling my first entry “The blog I’ve been waiting for” because it means so much to me.  I have been wanting to start writing one for so long, but it has taken a ridiculous amount of time for me to come out of my writing shell.  This is silly because I’m actually a pretty good writer, but there is a lingering voice inside me (as there probably is with most writers) that constantly asks why I think anyone would be interested in what I have to say.

Funnily enough, this is pretty much what my 11-year old son said to me yesterday when I told him my plans for starting a blog.  I felt the need to defend my creative dreams to my adolescent son.  I’m sure I’ll have plenty more to write about him.

I have many different experiences to share with people.  I am a single mother of two young boys.  I am about to turn 40…. the new 20, right?  I struggle with anxiety and depression, like many of us do, and I take medication for it.  I have chronic high blood pressure.  I am a public middle school English teacher.  I have a “boyfriend” (seems like a silly word at this age) and we pretty much have a long distance relationship.  I struggle with weight loss and lingering eating disorder issues.  I am adult child of two alcoholics, one who was also a drug addict and served time in prison (my mom).  I love to cook, and I love to go out to eat!  I’ve been looking into meditation, both at home and possibly in a public setting.  I lost my mother way too early in both of our lives; while I was pregnant with my now 5-year old.  I drive for Uber and Lyft part time.  I am trying to increase my net worth so I can accomplish all my financial goals, which I think is pretty exciting.  I think I have a lot to say about all these things, and I’m sure you do too.

I have been thinking about working in a group therapy setting, and talked about it recently with my therapist.  I came to this conclusion after working on something called Restorative Justice this summer with my colleagues. The classes were eye-opening and reinforced my desire to help young people, beyond ELA education.  In these classes my colleagues and I opened up about our own ongoing personal issues, and it soon becomes apparent that everyone, no matter how “perfect” they may seen, is fighting their own battle.  I felt great after talking with my fellow colleagues, who are also teachers, guidance counselors, moms, dads, grandparents, spouses, etc.  During the third “class” I realized that I needed to share what was going on in my life in a group setting; that it would be beneficial to my health.

While my therapist works on finding a group therapy setting that would benefit me, why can’t we get started on something like that here?  We can share what’s stressing us out in the worlds of parenting, teaching, and basically just “adulting”.

If you have any topics you would like for me to bring up, please let me know.  I sometimes am so exhausted that I have a hard time thinking up topics to write about, even though I have a billion things on my mind.

Today I went to the 6th grade orientation at the middle school I work at.  I have to do this every year, and it is not exactly fun.  In my classroom, I start to put chairs where I think they would fit best for the first week of school.  I look at all the incoming sixth graders, who still appear cute and innocent today… I probably look scary to them.  My oldest son starts sixth grade himself next week, so I keep thinking about that connection.  This year will be karma for all my teaching mistakes.

Today is also the last day of my youngest son’s summer camp.  Next week he will be starting kindergarten.  What the hell happened to the time?

Ok, it’s time to sign off and pick up my oldest, who just woke up even though it’s almost noon.  He is eleven but has many characteristics of a teenager already.

I’m excited about starting this, and I can’t wait to see what my followers might have to say!

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